The most devastating promises we can break are those we make to ourselves.
“Oh, I didn’t write today, but I promise I’ll spend two hours writing in the morning.” And then morning comes and I get distracted by emails that could be dealt with later, or I sleep too late, or I decide to get “all that other stuff” out of the way first and then write (which somehow never happens).
“Oops, I ate too much the last few days, but I promise I’ll get back on track tomorrow.” And then several weeks of overeating later I’m wondering what happened to the wonderful numbers I’d been seeing on the scale.
It’s that simple, but over time the failure to follow through eats away at your self esteem and your self image. Where you once envisioned a productive writer, your brain now believes that it was a lie and writing must not really be that important to you.
Where you once saw progress in shedding excess weight, you suddenly find yourself eating everything in sight.
The more self esteem drops, the easier it is to fall back on the bad habits that don’t get you where you want to be, because your brain now thinks it was never meant to be. Sometimes fear of failure—or success—causes you to push back against the tough goals. And then you throw your hands up and say, “Screw it! What ever made me think I could be a published author anyway? What a silly dream.”
And then you quit and find another goal or hobby, slowly dying inside because the stories in your head have no outlet. Because you’ve given up on your dream and on yourself.
I’m not going to let that be me. Please don’t let it be you either.
Get your pride and your dreams back. You can do it one day, one small promise at a time. Make little, tiny, non-threatening promises to yourself, those that won’t trigger the doubt monster that fears change, even good change. Write 15 minutes tomorrow. Skip one bite of dinner. Pass on the extra scoop of ice cream. Add ten minutes to your workout. Write that scene that’s been nagging at you for weeks.
Remember why you dreamed your dreams, and imagine how you’ll really feel about yourself if you don’t do everything in your power to make them come true. And then go and be the best you that you can.
We deserve our own time and energy.
Keep your promises to your friends and your family, don’t make promises you can’t afford to keep, and always keep your promises to yourself.
You’re worth it.
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Photo credit: DREAMY GIRL © Konstantin Tavrov | Dreamstime.com
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